Week 2: Patience

Hey everybody! Compassion Collective, it’s week two and this week’s focus is going to be patience.

Speaking of patience, I want to thank all of you who have signed up, I am floored by how many have! And for being patient as the first week’s video was about a week late … so my thank you to you for being patient and not being upset with me.

So what does patience mean? And I need to use my glasses, sorry guys, I’m just old. OK. Patience, the definition, is the capacity to accept or tolerate delay, trouble or suffering without getting angry or upset. Hmmm, that’s the key. So me, I have to tell you, I am horrible at patience. I have none! I have to constantly ask the Lord to grant me the grace of patience because it’s just not in my nature. I think all of us struggle with that.

So here’s the deal.

I’m going through not only a professional spiritual transformation, but I’m also going through a personal life transformation. My entire world is different than what it was eight months ago, for example. While I was going through this process of trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up and what I want to do – I wanted it done in a month. I got 30 days. I want to know my IT job, I want to know this, I want to know that, and you know what? It doesn’t work that way, especially when you’re going through major transformation or when you’re learning something new or when you’re teaching something to someone that’s new.

Let’s say you’re mentoring someone and they haven’t done this before or your children are learning a new sport and you just want them to get it now, but they’re learning and they’re taking some time and you have to have patience with that. When you’re standing in that grocery line and that guy just takes forever to put his food up on that belt and you got to get moving. You need to exhibit some patience. When you’re sitting in that traffic, just freaking out because you’re going to be late for that meeting. It’s out of your control, so take that opportunity to pull yourself together, maybe actually practice what it is that you need for that meeting, if you have a presentation or something. You need patience with your co-workers, with your husband, with your kids, with your dogs, with everything around you.

That is what I want you to focus on this week. Remember that you should not be getting angry about things that you cannot control. The real test here is how you react to all the stuff that comes at you. So let’s continue to remember compassion from the first week, right – and patience – they go hand in hand. That’s why it is the second topic, so be compassionate towards others, be patient with others and yourself.

This past weekend I recorded my audiobook. I was underneath a comforter in this makeshift kind of, you know, recording studio if you will, for 10 hours on Saturday. I have to re-record it. I don’t like it. I have to re-record it. You think I’m real happy about that? Do I have another 10 hours to “waste” under the comforter redoing this? No. But I have to love myself. I’ve never recorded a book before, so I’m learning and that takes patience. All of us should be learning new things and let’s be patient again, with ourselves and with others, and always with the overarching component of compassion.

Good luck this week—share with me how you’re doing. I will share with you throughout the week what things are challenging me from the patience side of the house and have a very blessed day!

Kendra Von Esh

Kendra Von Esh is a Speaker, Faith Coach, and Author who has a passion to help others to deepen their relationship with God and the Catholic Faith.

4 Comments

  1. Marie Sanderson on March 19, 2018 at 6:14 pm

    Ah patience…a ‘Virtue’.

    Patience for me is a daily struggle; sometimes an hourly struggle. Unfortunately we do not live it a static environment which surely would be easier ……. but just imagine the boredom.

    I am the type of person who would be considered a Type A……and probably (when I’m not in earshot) a Type A ++++ personality. I like to get a lot done, and I like to get it done quickly!!! No messing around for me, everything I do, I do in high gear. Now when the end result is less than satisfactory (and very often only to me) I go into ‘tear it down and rebuild it mode’. And until it’s complete I will stay in that mode…..and I’m the only one getting no sleep!! Everyone else is running in the other direction…. Now that is food for thought.

    I will keep your words in mind when I feel that high gear kicking in! Compassion and patience go hand in hand.



  2. Kendra Von Esh on March 20, 2018 at 6:38 am

    Hi Marie –

    Thank you for sharing the virtue of patience you struggle with – honestly, that most of us struggle with, you are not alone.

    While I do have a personality that thinks productivity = success I have been learning to stop myself often and try to enjoy what I am living right now. It is not easy to do this as you surely know. My Spiritual Director said to me “Sometimes God doesn’t want productivity (or perfection as you might strive for) he wants us to love and live for the now and enjoy all that makes up our day – today.”

    And that may mean you do nothing. Maybe you get a massage, manicure, go for a walk, take a long nap, curl up with a good book (I know of one – ha) or even better, stop in Adoration or the church for a quick visit to anchor your day.

    I, like you, have to remind myself every minute to ask for God’s help because it is so much easier to go right into our “list” of things to do and forget to stop, watch the sunrise (which will be coming up in about 20 minutes) say some prayers, ask God to guide us through the day and to show us where He is in it each moment.

    Patience is the hardest for me and I pray for the two of us that we can slow down and appreciate the delays and mishaps in our day today and every day. May God bless you, Marie – thanks for sharing your thoughts and for being a member of this awesome Collective Community!



  3. Brandies Mevaa on March 29, 2018 at 10:21 pm

    Being a mom has forced me to be a more patient person. It’s still a struggle. I try to remember when I’ve had hard days and bonehead moments before I blow my horn at the person in front of me, or before I lose my cool waiting for the customer in front of me to finish asking the barista 1000 questions. 🙂

    I am enjoying my growth and giving myself and others grace. I need them to give me grace when I’m less than patient and trust that I will grow in time and not continue to steamroll my fellow journeymen.

    One of the reasons I became an entrepreneur is to create opportunities for others to grow in a more compassionate environment. Where we aren’t defined by a single point in our history but by the multifaceted, gifted people we are today and the potential of what we could be in the future. We all have a God-given gift to impact the world in which we dwell.

    We need our leaders to be patient. We need them to have the patience to invest in what is possible and to see it through all the friction to behold the gem it produces. Those who are the least of us need the greatest we have to offer. Patience isn’t perfection, it’s just a key pillar of compassion that we should all strive to gain more of.



    • Kendra Von Esh on April 9, 2018 at 7:10 am

      I love your outlook, Brandies! I cannot imagine being a mother, this is one thing I have not done (at least from birthing a child and having them live with me full time, etc.) I can’t imagine how much patience you need to have and also how many millions of times a day you get that reminder of how blessed you are to have your children as they look at you in the midst of your daily, crazy routines and lives. 🙂

      I was actually in Confession and my priest made a comment that you can boil down my confession to fear. That fear will lead to many things, including patience (or lack thereof).

      I never quite looked at that in that way, not sure it is helpful, but it surely put a new light on how I was acting in my own life and now I look at fear differently and I think that is a huge aspect of my life I struggle with as I am transforming my professional life.

      Keep the comments coming, I love to hear how you feel and how you enjoy giving yourself and others grace, awesome, Brandies!