Go Find It


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Hello, my spiritual companions! I am so jazzed to come to you today because I am at a different place at a different time with a different message … and some cheer that I decided I was going to have.


Because I had one of the most incredible spiritual experiences this weekend, so my point of this video is to thank every person who has come across my path in the last year. I’m vastly, quickly approaching my year anniversary when I decided THIS was going to be my ministry! I chose to do this, not for me—but for you and all of your loved ones who are struggling with a prayer life, struggling with a relationship with God, continue to look for something thing more and finding it in nothing! The only place you can find something more is in the truth about God and the sacramental graces of the Catholic faith. I didn’t want to believe it, but I now know is true.

So let me tell you a little bit about what happened to me this weekend! It is flippin’ insane!

(Wine glass—big sip by Kendra) I feel like I’m sharing this with my best friend over a glass of wine. This is how intimate this is for me.

So, I attend a Totally Yours Marian Conference this weekend. They host it two times a year. Guy Murphy runs the event and it’s an amazing program. The first night there was a healing service after dinner. I have never attended a healing service or healing Mass so I wasn’t quite sure what to expect. I tried my best to get the lowdown of this healing service.

As a result, I decided to stay for the healing Mass because it sounded pretty cool. You would not believe what I saw—it actually scared me to death. Let’s just say there could have been a bit of a demon attack on a person at the conference.

So, back to the service. I walk up to the priest to have him pray for me.

I put my hands in his and he asks me to focus on Jesus. And then … I am OUT! I’m gone. I am on the floor—I am on the FLOOR! For the first few minutes, I cannot move and I am thinking, “What is going on here?” And I am embarrassed. I don’t know if I am hanging out of my clothes or what I look like being on a concrete banquet hall floor.

As I attempt to get up the priest says to me, “Stay down, spend time with Jesus….”

I was thinking, “Are you kidding me? I am sprawled out on the floor, people are walking over my head and I am supposed to stay down here?” But I did and was at complete peace.

Listen, peeps, I had food. My blood sugar was great. This is not a faint. I was overwhelmed. The feeling was TOTALLY different. Most of you have heard me share my supernatural sacramental graces from God—this was different.

I was on fire and then I spoke today, which is Sunday. I’m sorry, you normally get this on Monday. I just floated out of that conference. I was one of the last to leave with the exception of all the people that put the conference together.

I must thank everybody. There was so much love and support this weekend. It’s a bit insane when you’re trying to speak, sign books, connect with people BUT with everyone helping me, I had no stress! You all know who you are and I want to thank you from the depths of my heart! This is what I am talking about—spiritual companions who would darn near die for you!

I have been so blessed with so many amazing spiritual companions on my journey and this weekend was no exception! I changed the vlog because of my experience this weekend with my “slay in the spirit” or “rest in the spirit” moment.

And I want you to “Go Find It!”


Go ask God to come into your heart. That’s all you have to do!

I also want to let you know when I’m out speaking, I receive a lot of questions, “How do I deepen my prayer life? I don’t think I’ve ever heard the voice of God. I’m not really sure I’m praying in the right way.”

It never fails. At least one person comes to me and asks me this question. I want to let you know I’m working on an online video prayer program.

How would you like me in your inbox for 40 days helping you deepen your relationship with God? This program is for everybody! Prayer warriors, as well as newbies and people just sniffing around the faith. It will surely be a refreshing spiritual shot in the arm that’ll shake your minutiae up.

Stay tuned for that! I just want to let you know I’ve been listening to what people are asking from me as I’m out and about. So if you have thoughts or ideas, I am game! I’m starting to break into the high school and college demographic as well as Young Catholic Professionals—I’m super excited about that!

As for God—don’t wait. Don’t wait! Life is so incredible with God. There’s a reason I left my career to do just this to help you live a better, easier, happier life. What’s wrong with that? Why wouldn’t you partner with the Creator who not only created the universe but you with your unique talents, your unique experiences, your unique education, and your unique physical nature? You’re here for a reason whether you like it or not. There are no mistakes with God. You have a purpose and a meaning, so go find it!

If you don’t know what that is … I know someone who can tell you—Jesus!

I finally know the meaning of life, the reason I’m here, the purpose for my being and I am overjoyed! I am over the moon with these amazing graces I have received and then this happens to me this weekend. I’ve never had that happen to me before, which is why I am sharing.

I love you all. Go find God ask Him to come into your life and tell you how to live it.

Let me touch on the Gospel for this week, briefly.

Sonny, a man at the conference asked, “How did you make the decision to leave all that money?” He’s a pharmacist. He’s trying to climb the ladder, make more money but it’s not to be rich. It’s to be financially secure. It’s to feel comfortable and safe, which is fine because everybody wants that.

I told him, for me, the money meant nothing. I have to look at God when I die. I have to look at him and say, “Yes, God, I know you want me to be a disciple and make disciples, but I decided to continue down this path over here and do my own thing. I’m going to keep my amazing faith and grace to myself.”

Listen, money is great. Go make money. Make a lot of it, but be a good steward of it. If you’re out there making money, help people with it. Don’t hoard it. The Gospel today was the poor old widow who donates two copper coins, which is a penny, but that’s her life savings—her life—right there in the bucket. In contrast, all the wealthy put in gobs of money, but they still have a surplus. So, the widow is far more generous and faithful of God to provide.

Whatever your offering is, it doesn’t have to be financial, you have a gift. Maybe you’re a talented musician, maybe you’re an author, maybe you connect with the youth, want to cure cancer, make the next best technology … I don’t know what your talent is, but I do know that you are here for a reason and He knows exactly what that is. Maybe you’re just afraid to actually use them, which is where God also comes in.

If you thought I was NOT scared out of my mind to leave my corporate executive career to focus on my ministry, you are sadly mistaken. I cried ALL the time. I was scared out of my mind, but how did I get out of it?

I would say, “Jesus, I don’t know what I’m doing. Can you please help me?”

And now, almost a year later, I come out of a conference, a completely different Christian, a different Catholic. I am absolutely am floored with this.

Two takeaways:

  1. Go Find It! If you don’t have it, ask for it. Ask God into your life! And whoever is watching that already has God in their life, please forward those to who do not. Please—have them email me, talk to me!
  2. Be good stewards of your money—it is OKAY to make money! Just don’t pile it up beyond you/your family’s needs. Help others who are less fortunate in some way.

I’m going to continue with my wine, relish in my amazing spiritual weekend and just thank God for all of the amazing spiritual companions I met. I am going to thank God for exposing me to true good and evil.

So you just get out there, ask God to help you live your life and to be good stewards with your money. Have a blessed and inspired day—Jesus is real. He is real.

Kendra Von Esh

Kendra Von Esh is a Speaker, Faith Coach, and Author who has a passion to help others to deepen their relationship with God and the Catholic Faith.

1 Comment

  1. Kendra Von Esh on November 13, 2018 at 7:41 am

    So, I had to find out more about this healing service. What I experienced is called, “Resting in the Spirit or Slain/Slayed in the Spirit.”

    I wish I knew more about this beforehand. I wish I knew what to expect, what to do during and after and IF I should be doing it at all. It appears there is a little bit of tension within the Catholic Community at large.

    All I know is that I felt something I have never experienced before – and if that was the Holy Spirit working on healing me of my sins and afflictions – I think I am pretty cool about that.

    I am interested in other thoughts here. I am always learning and want to do what conservative Catholics who are devoted to Our Lady should do!

    What say you?